Are We At the Halfway Point?
We are at the halfway point in our year, and here is what is happening…
Recent Posts
Seeking Sabbath: 40 Days of Quarantine
We are literally on hiatus from our normal daily rhythms. Which makes me wonder if this will help us decide which rhythms are the most important.
The Quarantine Begins
Flowers that have no idea we are quarantined.
It’s amazing to me that two weeks ago, everything was slightly different. The week before that, it was only very slightly different. We had been watching and waiting to hear how our country was going to handle a virus we had never seen. I thought back on other viruses that had traveled around but been quickly squashed. Most importantly, the Ebola outbreak of 2014, which killed more than 2000 people but was actually pretty quickly contained. Those of you who work in infectious disease, I thank you. You don’t often come up in conversation because you do such an excellent job of not making these things an issue in our day-to-day lives.
At this point, I think we all have questions. How did we let it get this bad? How many people will we know to get it? How will it affect our lives going forward? I recently read The Great Mortality : an intimate history of the black death, the most devastating plague of all time (Kelly), and Very, Very, Dreadful: The Influenza pandemic of 1918 (Marrin). They are both informative non-fiction books looking at two pandemics which hit hard.
When most people think plague, the bubonic black plague is what comes to mind. Imagine sanitation that looked like this: you needed to dump your chamber pot out. It’s cold, or hot outside. You go to the window. You look out. You shout: “Look out below!” three times. Then, dump away! Yes, really. That was the essence of sanitation code until not so very long ago. If you’re fantasizing about living in the time of Outlander, don’t forget that very real piece of urban city life. What I found most interesting was that the black plague popped up again as an epidemic (though much more treatable) in the mid-1980s in Afghanistan.Russian soldiers stationed there were apparently not ordered to change their underwear much, or wash hands, or sheets. So they didn’t- the average soldier changed once every 3 months. But it was handled fairly quickly and got under control again, as officers were informed they would have to order soldiers to practice good hygiene. It’s a good reminder to parents everywhere- we have to push these issues at home, so our kids will just keep themselves clean when they aren’t living with us.
Flu Pandemic of 1918: Stemming from soldiers as they returned from World War I, the first wave was considered a curiosity as it hit Fort Riley in Kansas. This, of course, would only be the first of three waves of flu that would in the end kill millions more than those who died in war. This flu strain would be contracted by roughly one-third of the population at the time (somewhere in the neighborhood of 500 million). There is not even a firm number as to how many people died from it. Coughing and sneezing in public would illicit a massive fine and jail time once it was deemed illegal. Jews and Italians were blamed for the being the source of the flu. Authorities attempted to limit human contact in order to limit the spread. Dance halls and other public venues were encouraged to close at the recommendation of the Surgeon General, but because no official order came, each community was expected to act on their own based on what their elected officials thought best. In New York City, public libraries, the NYSE, and private clubs were required to close their doors. But subways, churches, department stores and factories stayed open along with bars- because these workers needed relaxation time after working hours. Some towns closed their borders, similar to what happened during the Yellow Fever of 1793. People were recommended to eat onions, gargle daily, and stay home if they had a cold. Kids wanting to skip school only needed to inhale a little pepper in the morning- one sneeze would have them at home for the day. Do we talk about how comforting it is that children are the same?
Why would I pick up such light reading during this time? information really is power. Understanding how past pandemics have spread throughout the world helps us to understand how they might happen in the future. It also makes me feel better. We know to wash our hands and each day we are adding extra steps. For years, meaning my whole adult life, I have believed we were on top of things. How could we not be? We have so much technology. So much knowledge of how disease spreads, of what might be out there. My understanding was we had entire squads devoted to keeping an eye on developing diseases and squashing them. I could point to diseases- look at Sars! Avian Flu! Swine Flu! Ebola- hello, Ebola crisis- did NO ONE ELSE READ THE NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC??? It was terrifying- there was definitely a minute in which things could have taken a turn. But they didn’t.
For the most part, I had just been living in my bubble. Children, work, hiking, the gym, some travel. Planning more travel. Always planning more travel. It just didn’t occur to me that one day it would stop. Even when I heard murmurings of a virus that was hitting China, I naively assumed it wouldn’t affect me directly. Why would it? Yes, we don’t have the greatest healthcare system, but Europe is really solid, and the World Health Organization would be on top of it, right? It literally never occurred to me that it would not only fly into the United States, but then the person carrying it and all the other passengers would be allowed to disperse. Because that’s how you end up with an outbreak. That didn’t come from any book I read. Mainly it came from watching movies like I am Legend, World War Z, 28 days Later, and Zombieland. But you probably don’t want to watch anything like that right now. Watch Tiger King, and House Hunters International and Emma (please watch Emma. You can order it for a crazy high price from Amazon but if you have any affection for Jane Austen, tea, and love, it is WORTH it. Quarantine during the age of Covid-19. We have plenty of content to watch and read.
To recap, if you’ve made it this far:
- Rent Emma, or watch Tiger King with your Netflix subscription.
- Read a book- maybe choose something a little lighter than what I did. You can always contact me for reading suggestions.
- Don’t worry about reading The Great Mortality– just know that the Bubonic Plague was crazy bad and is still out there floating around. We just wash a little more now. A lot more now. Parents of teenagers, you can use this in your hygiene lessons.
- Check out (and identify) the flowers at the top of the page- they just came out this week!
- Biggest take-away? This, too, shall pass.
Why We Need Mr. Rogers
I know it’s an odd title for a blog post because there should not be a “why” behind it, but frankly I’m sleep deprived and couldn’t think of a better one. Mr. Rogers has been on a lot of people’s minds recently- the fantastic documentary […]
Disney World: The Arrival
Day 1: We are at home,early in the morning, with me timidly asking if I can go for a short run (super short, like twenty minutes, tops). My husband belly laughs for the first time all week. My parents show up mid-morning since they […]
Disney in a Week
Photo by Lilly Rum on Unsplash
It had been in the back of my mind for months. I would occasionally drift over to the website and play with imaginary numbers. I pictured the “right year” to go on what would be “a once in a lifetime” trip. Then, on what felt like the four thousandth rainy, cold day in a row, I just did it. I punched in my credit card numbers and wondered how this would affect our budget for the next year. But instead of stopping myself, I called to confirm everything. I then ran down the stairs to share the news.
“We’re going to Disney!” I chirruped to my husband excitedly. I probably also clapped. Love a hand gesture.
“What are you talking about?” He turned away from the dishes in the sink to stare at me, head slightly tilted, assessing the situation. Because that’s what he does. He assesses, and thinks, and weighs his options. It can take him months to select a shirt for purchase. I just purchased a complete package at Disney World, and a flight to take us all on our first family vacation as a family of 4. In under 30 minutes.
“I went through lots of different dates and packages, and realized the least expensive time for us to go was, well… now. I priced out a lot of different dates and flights, and found one that is so cheap- it’s on Frontier, have you heard of them? And then, I looked at the hotels, and chatted with a personal planner from Disney, and I booked a trip for us to go to Disney world!”
“When?” He asked very softly, already trying to slowly and carefully inhale, and exhale.
“Sunday.”
“Today?”
“No! That would be crazy. We’re going…next Sunday.”
We were going to Disney World. We were a family and we were going to Disney, which is a completely normal pastime. Millions of people do it every year- close to 20 million last year alone. It’s not like I’m trying to take us to Timbuktu.
“Are you serious? I didn’t think you would actually do it. Next week? Didn’t we decide to wait until the kids were older? Can we handle a toddler in Disney?”
“People do it all the time. Plus he’s free until three! See, I’m SAVING us money.”
I wasn’t saving us money. I was panicking. I was seeing the end of my daughter’s preschool days, and knew how much she loved every single Disney character right at this very moment. I think about the day it will change, the day she will grow into another phase and this phase will be lost. I also knew where we stood at that very moment. No one was teething, or had an ear infection. I knew that we had not recently been hit by some five digit home repair bill that would have us putting off this trip again and again. I knew I wasn’t working full time so I could take the time, and I knew my husband who works hard seven days a week, needed to take this time. Outside it was cold and gray even as spring approached.
The first major hurdle- because, let’s face it, giving Disney a credit card number isn’t exactly a hurdle- was telling our parents we were going to Disney. I knew mine would think we were insane to go on a huge trip with one week’s notice. You read that correctly. We were a week out from our first flight. I tentatively pressed my mother’s contact, hoping that she was volunteering or working or maybe getting her hair done. But she answered on the second ring, cheerful and happy to hear from me, wondering what we would be doing for my son’s birthday. I finally said, “Mom, I have something to tell you.” Words that generally mean one is in jail, pregnant, or possibly in jail and pregnant.
“We’re going to Disney World. Next week.”
There was silence on the other end, and I knew she was processing my words while I cringed. We are a family of planners. We don’t just pack a suitcase and get on a plane. We spend years talking about places we would like to visit, then months finding a flight and hotel, then weeks packing and unpacking our suitcase prior to leaving. My mother has literally been talking about visiting Paris nearly her whole life. I, on the other hand, have spent nearly my whole life shocking her with my own travels- a favorite memory is the time she called me at college, to find out I was actually standing in the middle of Times Square. This was going to be a reach.
“Well, I don’t know what to say. Are you sure it’s a good idea?”
Of course not. I’m never sure, and even less so when booking non refundable tickets. I ran through a list in my head of all the ways this trip could go wrong. My husband had mentioned a scratchy throat- could he be getting strep? My son had been pulling on his left ear lately- was it possible he did have an ear infection? We were only taking two suitcases. I can usually take up two suitcases. How many princess gowns fit into two carry on suitcases? My shoe options were going to be extremely limited. Of course, I elected to tell her nothing about those concerns.
“Yes! It will be great!” I said, and then spouted off the reasons everyone should go to Disney World on a whim.
We spent the week packing, arguing over what to take (I said pajamas for each night, and my husband thought two pairs per kid was plenty), obsessively packing and repacking the two large suitcases my parents lent me, calling Disney on a daily basis to talk about food reservations and fast passes (apparently you are supposed to line up both these things 180 days in advance now. Gone are the lackadaisical 1980’s Disney days of waiting in line two hours to be on Space Mountain for two minutes), and joining a Facebook group about traveling to Disney that basically made me out to be a lunatic. But I’m not- I’m just a tired mother of two with a husband working around the clock and a desire to experience something new with our family. Thus our trip began.
Soothing Effects of Laundry
Last night, at 10:30 p.m., I was in my pajamas, scooping up as many Duplos as I could and doing a quick list check in my head. What was on the agenda for tomorrow? Answer: I couldn’t remember. How were we on diapers? Answer: poor. […]
40 Parks, 40 Reasons to get Outside
Several months ago, my husband mentioned that he wanted to get back into hiking and backpacking (which is really different from camping, because instead of keeping everything conveniently in your car, you actually wear pounds of items on your back and walk far into places […]
We Live Like the…
I’m currently perusing home improvement books I’ve picked up at the library. They’re gorgeous and for the most part show these beautiful completely unobtainable (at least for me) homes. I sit, in the midst of the chaos that two small people can create in a room, and I dream of how peaceful it could be if…. something. Something were different. Like if I had an extra million dollars burning a hole in my pocket, or if we had a different layout, or if the cats wouldn’t scratch furniture or if the kids lost their desire to use play-doh and markers. There is a lot of if.
This week, however, I grabbed a slightly different book. It’s called How the French Live : Modern French Style (Siham, Mazouz, Gibbs Smith, 2018), and is written by a French woman who loves ecletic interiors and living a balanced life. She “curates” a blog (French by Design) which I am now addicted to, because beyond the amazing traits I listed, she also throws in recipes. She encourages people to live like the French, who apparently use what they have as far as furnishing their homes, and really focus on their families and what they need. I really hope that one day I can connect with her, and if Si, if you ever read this, I am more than happy to head out to San Francisco to have a cafe au lait with you. Seriously.
As I began flipping through the pages, sitting at our own very formal dining room table in our very informal dining room, with my children munching on Cheerios and asking me to show them pictures before declaring the book “bo-ring”, I started to wonder what it is we love about French culture. It’s easy to say “Nutella crepes and baguettes” and call it a day, but I think it’s much more important to consider how French culture values lives.
One of the best parts about having the opportunity to stay home this year, is having room to think. For the first time in twenty years, I’m not working a formal 40 hour a week job. Instead, I’m more or less working a 24/7 job, but it’s the most important job. At dinner with friends the other night, I told them I feel like I have space to think. Not every single day, but many days I’ll have thirty minutes or an hour in which I can take a break, sit with a cup of tea and consider what our whole life looks like. It feels like so much to take on. We spend each day in the grind, and as days fly by we barely notice them until there are markers to the passing- a birthday, Christmas, another summer trip to the beach. But how often do we truly consider how we live? How do we want to live with this singular time we have on a planet that will eventually pass on to other people?
Let’s not get into the philosophical details of my thinking process here- it’s long, and drawn out, and really better done in person where I can gesture and draw diagrams if needed. The point is that part of this experiment is developing a plan to help our home. And, as a librarian, that means lots of research. I.E., reading blogs, trying DIY projects, and looking through gorgeous books and magazines.
Back to this one. In this book, Si visits multiple families who are French and living abroad or in France. My favorite pictures are the ones from the South of France- all those friends who escape the city vibes of Paris for Aix-en-Provence? Yes, please. It also briefly touches on the fact that apparently French kids eat all the things (though I have noticed that she doesn’t specify whether or not they do it joyfully), and everyone enjoys meals outside a lot. I just glanced out our window and it’s a sunny, 34 degree morning.
But what I loved about it was that it wasn’t asking me to purchase things, or better yet just pick up something amazing at the flea market at 6 a.m., sand it down and repaint it in my spare time. It really does feel like you’re simply visiting these people who will invite you for dinner in their minimalist but not cold homes. The other piece of this book that I loved is that recipes are included, so you too can experience a tartiflette in your own haven.
Of course, there are some major differences.
We have a little ways to go. But the most important piece is out there- how do we want to live our lives? How do we create living spaces that reflect our pasts, our presents, and support our futures? While this is not Marie Kondo (though I revisit her amazing book about twice a year), it is about thinking about what makes a home. Namely, designing a space that can support families, and company, and laughter and joy, and tears. This volume does a fantastic job of inspiring the average American person to look deep, think wide, and consider how we live. On that note, I’m off to fold laundry that will likely end up on the floor later this afternoon.
A Visit with Santa
It began with a grain of inspiration. Actually, that’s not true. It really began with a trip to the mall with my youngest the week of Thanksgiving. We did everything wrong. We showed up precariously close to lunchtime, then went into a […]
